A man runs for a train at Etchingham, in East Sussex. The train starts as the man clambers aboard and tumbles into a seat. His fellow passengers applaud him and make encouraging remarks.
Minutes later a guard appears. His voice betrays his anger. He takes his job very seriously. Who jumped aboard the train at the station when the train was moving? he asks.
Everyone looks blank. Everyone shrugs. No one in this carriage, mate, says a man in a yellow jacket. You must have imagined it.
After the guard has gone the yellow-jacket man gives the late passenger a small badge. The print is tiny, though, and, what with the motion of the train, the lack of light and my poor eyesight, It’s impossible to read from where I’m sitting.