Valentine

As sure as summer

Follows spring

As sure as a pebble

Flies from a sling

As swallows mate

Upon the wing

As Bob and Dorothy

Follow Bing

As Elvis Presley

Was the King

As a ready microwave

Goes ping

As your morning smile

Makes my heart go zing

You dazzle me

Like a rapper’s bling

Because you’re my Valentine

And that’s the thing

A Million Tons of Junk

Look at all that stuff!

Without electricity

It’s nothing but

A million tons of junk

Like me without you

But when you flip my switch

I am cathode rays
Neon signs
Humming radios

Radar blips

Torch lights

City lights

Satellites

The cries and shouts

And wails and hurrahs

Of Fender guitars

Of bands in bars

I am transformed

Capacitated

Transcended

By your loving

Electricity

In Good Shape

I Circle you

Like picnic bears

And cuddle you

All night

Triangle you

(Each corner

A space filled

With delight)

I Oblong you

My obligation’s

Elongate and sure

I Square you

To my conscience

And consciousness

And more

I Diamond you

You’re priceless

Your Star shape

Cannot fall

You’re my sweet

And sexy Hexy shape

But I Heart you

Most of all

You’ll Be Here

When the ice is as thick

as an ice-maiden’s shtick

and the sky is as grey

as Sam Beckett’s lost playand
the wind is as keen

as a miser is mean

and the winter’s as deep

as philosopher’s sleep,

you’ll be here for the ride

with a smile as wide and as warm

as a schoolgirls’ dorm

with a cuddle as close

as warm, buttered toast,

with a laugh as out loud

as a sky without cloud,

with a love as intense

as the sky is immense:

you’ll be here by my side

The Worst Christmas

The worst Christmas

Was when Mum was in hospital

And Dad, bless him,

Made a right pig’s ear

Of the Christmas turkey.

On Christmas Eve he dressed up as Santa

Red coat, big bushy beard -

And Mum dressed up as a reindeer

Big antlers, red nose -

And it was all going so well

I was pretending to be asleep

As Dad crept in, when

Shriek!

Clatter clatter clatter

Thump!

Mum fell off the roof.

All We Do at Christmas

All we do at Christmas

Is sit and watch TV

Mum and Dad and Sis and Gran

And Grandpapa and me

My best mate Bill, and all his lot

Play Christmas games and cards

Have quizzes and win prizes

Dress up and play charades

And Jenny’s family go to church

They’re Christians and they believe

She stays up late and goes to church

At midnight, Christmas Eve

And Jason, who’s a Muslim

And Margie, who’s a Jew

Still think about what Christmas means

But take a wider view

But we don’t do much thinking

We just sit and watch TV

There’s Mum and Dad and Sis and Gran

And Grandpapa and me

Seven Stars

Seven stars are shining
As the sun falls from the sky
Six rooks dance their goodnight dance
And wish the day goodbye

Five bats skim the castle walls
Waiting for the bell
For soon the moon will break the news
It’s waited long to tell

Four owls leave the tower tall
Hungry to spread the word
To wit, to woo a mouse or two
In case you haven’t heard

Three horses in the courtyard
Beneath the flickering light
Two men exchange quiet glances
And ride into the night

And deep within the castle
In the centre of the keep
One maiden lies alone, alone
And tries to get to sleep